Y Talk: How to Have a Successful Marriage…with Your Gym by Justin Rose

Recently I was doing some research on healthy psychological adjustment. During this research I came across a number of articles regarding marriage success rates and what factors lead to the least successful marriages. Beyond my obvious interest in learning how my own marriage stacked up, I also wondered if some of these principles could be applied to general relationships. More importantly how could these factors influence our ability to stay with a service, store or program through the good and the bad? I’m sure if you thought about it long enough you could think of a number of brands or stores or vendors that you always use no matter the price or the how long the drive.

Although there are eight known factors that have been proven to scientifically effect the likelihood that a marriage we be unsuccessful, I believe three factors translate well to our relationships with our fitness goals and our chosen place for exercise.

INSECURITY

The first factor is insecurity, in which one person, or both, have developed an insecure personality adjustment (Stanley, 2015). I think the effects of insecurity are evident to anyone that has ever been in love as a teenager! However, as an adult searching for the right place to start your fitness journey you need to feel secure in who you are and what you are looking for. The right gym will focus on you and make you feel comfortable no matter how you look or where you are starting your fitness journey. This will not only increase the likelihood of you staying with your gym but, I this action will also help you build confidence regarding your fitness goals.

LENGTH OF ACQUAINTANCE AND MUTUAL DEDICATION

The second factor is the length of acquaintance and mutual dedication (Lee, 2001) (Stanley, 2015). When looking at successful marriages, those that have been together longer, prior to marriage, show mutual dedication (Stanley, 2001). This mutual dedication results in higher marriage success rates and those with less mutual dedication have lower marriage success rate.

In relation to having a meaningful fitness experience, this translates well. Those that have been with their gym feel connected to the people and the place. They have a mutual dedication that cannot be duplicated. This factor directly correlates with the successful completion of fitness goals and continuation of a healthy lifestyle. Your gym should be mutually dedicated to you and your success.

LIKE MINDEDNESS OR SIMILARITY

The third and final factor is the like mindedness or similarity (Stanley, 2015) (Lee, 2001). When looking for a partner the old adage of “opposites attract” often is recited. In fact that is true, opposites do attract, at least initially and then quickly fall out of favor. Existing research overwhelmingly supports the idea that similarity leads to attraction and better quality relationships compared to opposites (Lewandoski, 2014). This would mean that those that do not have much in common with their potential mate have little chance of success compared to those that have more in common with their potential mate.

This also applies to finding the right gym for your fitness goals. You should look for an organization that has the same beliefs that you do, with the same principles and general expectations. Joining a gym because it is cheap is not necessarily aligning you to your fitness goals. Joining a gym that gives back socially, develops youth in the community and cares about your wellness is much different than joining a gym that collects your money.

-by Justin Rose, Associate Executive Director

Lee, T. R. (2001). Factors that make a difference in marital success. Retrieved from: http://strongermarriage.org/married/factors-that-make-a-difference-in-marital-success

Lewandoski, G. (2014). Do opposites attract? Retrieved from: http://www.scienceofrelationships.com/home/2011/4/14/do-opposites-attract.html

Stanley, S. (2015). How to lower your risk of divorce: Advice to singles. Retrieved from: http://family-studies.org/how-to-lower-your-risk-of-divorce-advice-to-singles